We constantly make decisions, big or small, safe or risky. Even deciding not to act is itself a decision, which has its consequences . By making decisions, we exercise our highest right: free will. Right of which they cannot deprive us even in the most terrible circumstances because, however limited the alternatives may be, we will always have a margin of choice.
Our decisions reflect our beliefs, our values, our attitudes, our attitudes and even our self-esteem. Through them we become the creators of the conditions of our life, the proponents of our destiny. In our hands, some of the chances of becoming what we really want to be or transforming ourselves into a mediocre version of ourselves lie.
Without haste, but without stopping
There are some decisions that are easy to make, but there are others that don’t make us sleep at night, because we have so many options and we don’t know which one to choose or because we think in advance about the possible consequences of these choices.
When it comes to difficult decisions, it is crucial to know what you really want, which involves a process and a search within ourselves. As simple as this may seem, in reality it is not, because it is necessary to arm ourselves with courage and honesty and to silence many deceptive voices that do not reflect our essence, but are instead the product of conditioning that occurred in the course of life.
When we finally feel the silence within us and are able to listen to our heart, what emerges could scare us, because it may be necessary to get rid of some structures that until then had represented a secure basis for us. Among these we include: career, friendships, relationships, marriage,… Perhaps they respond to the need to seek the approval of others and to satisfy the expectations of others or to find material security or to avoid risks and criticism. However, it is worth daring, facing our fears and following our intuition, as we can correct the inevitable mistakes made along the way . While condemning oneself to live a mediocre life is always a sad fate.
How to decide?
To help you navigate this stormy sea of decisions to make, we offer the following guide, which will follow you step by step until you reach a safe harbor:
- Formulate the decision you want to make by writing a description that is as precise and brief as possible. You can make a collage of images about what you want to achieve. This can be inspiring and help visualize your goal more clearly.
- Identify the underlying problem or need that makes it difficult for you to make this decision, take note of the concerns surrounding it and the factors that complicate it.
- Formulate the goal you want to achieve, writing down the possible consequences of that decision and what you want to gain from that choice.
- Identify resources that can help you make this decision, such as people or organizations that can help you with information, training, empathy, or wise advice.
- Analyze other options or decisions you might make, alternatives you might consider. Make a list to look at the situation from different angles; this can bring you interesting ideas. Also include in the list those “crazy ideas” that do not convince you now, but that, over time, who knows …
- Weigh the alternatives, trying to predict the positive and negative consequences of each.
- Make your decision, choosing the option that best matches your personality.
- Decide how you will act, starting with the decision you have made.
- Evaluate your decision, verifying how you feel in relation to the path taken.
It is clear that making decisions is a tortuous process, due to all the factors that are at play and the fact that no one teaches us to do so; but, by applying all of these tips and drawing on your inner source of wisdom and inspiration, you can get the best reward: making your dreams come true.
Image courtesy of Pablo Fernández.